The Teeniest Tip of the Largest Iceberg

Published 21/10/2020

The Blurt Foundation has written this fantastic piece this week called The Teeniest Tip of the Largest Iceberg. It helps us think that we might not always know what is happening for other people but, what works beautifully is a touch of kindness. 

  • That ‘snappy’ person might be experiencing sensory overload
  • That ‘irritable’ person might be experiencing an anxiety attack
  • That ‘smiley’ person might be masking depression
  • That ‘loud’ person might be feeling awfully socially awkward
  • That ‘sensitive’ person might’ve experienced more trauma and pain than you can ever imagine
  • That ‘aloof’ person might be painfully shy
  • That ‘oversharing’ person might be really lonely and isolated
  • That ‘angry’ person might be carrying unimaginable stresses and strains
  • That ‘messy’ person might be dealing with a tangly mind
  • That ‘grumpy’ person might have just received some really horrible news
  • The ‘happy’ person might be juuuust about keeping it all together
  • And so on.

We just can’t ever know what’s going on for another. We can’t. What we see, well, that’s the tiniest tip of the largest of icebergs. Always know there’s more going on than we’re privy to. That there’s stuff happening behind the scenes that we don’t know or mightn’t understand. What you see in someone, isn’t all they *can* be and that’s so very important.

Before casting judgments, aspersions, criticisms, and side-eyes, consider a time when you mightn’t have been your best self around others – what was going on for you? What do you wish those people had seen, said, or done?

In those moments where you question a person’s wholeness based on a facial expression or a huff or a sigh or a behaviour, question the narrative you align with it more. There’s never a bad time to give people the benefit of the doubt. 

There’s never a wrong time to be kind.

Kim Fry
UKSA Welfare Officer