Too much

Published 03/06/2021

In the past the fabulous Blurt it out foundation has talked about not-enough-ness but the piece for this week speaks about too-much-ness and how that can be just as debilitating.

The implication that we’re too much.

Perhaps it’s been implied that we’re a chatterbox, that we talk too much.
Perhaps it’s been implied that we’re a snowflake, that we care and feel too much.
Perhaps it’s been implied that we’re complex, not fitting into someone else’s labels and molds and expectations.
Perhaps we’ve been told to calm down as we talk with passion and zest.
Maybe it’s our too ‘full-on-ness’, or our ‘too organised-ness’, or our ‘too focused-ness’.

Whatever it is, we’ll have been too much something for someone.

Or too little for others.

When we shrink ourselves down to their ‘not too much-ness’ we can feel contracted, trapped, suffocated.

We try to meet their ‘not too little-ness’ we feel exhausted, drained and as though they keep moving that barometer.

You honestly can’t win,  when you try to fit in or meet the approval of others. You will always always been too much for some and not enough for the rest, compromising yourself and your integrity along the way as you mesh, mold, shrink and squash yourself.

On some level we totally know this, right?
But in reality, it doesn’t stop us trying.

The trouble is, we sometimes squish, swish, and wish ourselves into who we aren’t and that’s the very worst bit – when we don’t like who we’ve become.

You,  are just right when you are being your truest self. When you’re meeting your own approval of how much you are and how much you aren’t. The most valuable approval comes from within, always. If that means being too much for some and too little for the rest, so be it. You are not here to be just like everyone else, you’re here to be you.

Kim Fry
UKSA Welfare Officer